Archives for November 3, 2022

Splitting from your partner can be an extremely tough and emotional time. Even if the split is mutual and you both agree it is for the best, that doesn’t erase the feelings you may be going through. If you and your partner share children, there’s no such thing as a clean break where you can each go your separate ways and heal, as you will still have a relationship parenting your children together. So, how can you keep things amicable when splitting from your partner?

We’ve got a few tips that can help you get past this very difficult time and get you to the other side.

Hold Back on the Trash-Talking

While your first impulse might be to engage in a battle filled with trash-talking, the fact is that won’t help anything – it will likely make the situation worse. If the two of you share kids you both must agree not to speak negatively about the other in front of the kids. They are going through a very hard time, and they need to know their parents love them and support them.

That’s not to say you can’t have feelings of anger and disappointment towards your ex, it’s just best to discuss that with a close friend, family member or a therapist.

Stay On Topic When Speaking

If the idea of small talk is too much for you to handle, do not worry as your goal should be to stay on topic. When there is something the two of you need to discuss or agree upon, that is the only topic that needs to come up. It keeps things brief and to the point, and hopefully doesn’t allow for arguments to happen.

Feel an Argument Brewing? Take Time to Cool Off

If you do feel an argument brewing, the best thing to do is take time to cool off. It is better to end the conversation and agree to speak later when things have cooled off. Just like trash-talking, arguments aren’t productive and will ruin any chance of things staying amicable.

Show Respect to One Another

Showing respect to one another can help smooth over hurt feelings and ensure you can find a neutral ground. Respect doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything they say and do, but it does mean you respect their choices and won’t argue with them. Of course, giving respect to your ex-partner means they need to give it back.

Some people find it can be helpful to remember that this is a person you once loved, who had qualities you admired and respected.

Finding It Hard to Speak to Your Ex? It May Be Best to Use a Solicitor

Even with all of these tips and your best intentions, it still may be too difficult and painful to speak to your ex-partner. As time passes and you heal, you may be able to speak down the road, but when feelings are fresh, it can be best to do your talking and negotiating through experienced family law solicitors. Not only can these solicitors help in terms of doing the talking for you, but they can help give you advice on how to best proceed with a divorce. They can speak to you about your rights, child custody, prenuptial agreements, injunctions and more.

For many recently separated couples, an amicable split doesn’t just happen overnight. It tends to take work, time and patience from both of you. Showing kindness and empathy can make a very sad and angry time more positive, allowing you both to walk away healthily.